"Emotion can be the enemy. If you give in to your emotion, you lose yourself. You must be at one with your emotions because the body always follows the mind." Those are the words of legendary martial artist, Bruce Lee.
It's hard to argue with the premise that emotions are the most powerful force governing our behavior. In many cases, emotions serve as great guardians of your well-being. Their primary function is to ensure your survival so, they can be strong allies.
Do you remember the old adage, "With friends like these, who needs enemies?" That couldn't ring more true than when it comes to emotions.
It is a scientific fact that if left untamed, our basic emotions (anger, joy, disgust, surprise, distress, and fear) would cause you to kill first and ask questions later. Or run first and ask questions later. This is known as Flight or Fight Response.
Flight or Fight Response applies to more than physical situations. Emotions gone wild will have you shouting, crying, or making incorrect assumptions. All of this is done in the name of survival.
In the heat of the moment, be it physical or psychological, your body initially responds to attacks (i.e. insults) a similar same manner. Think about that.
Although they are supposed to be our friends, emotions frequently leave us in a world of trouble. Why? The answer is simple.
Human beings are biologically engineered for survival, not diplomacy.
For countless generations, the emotional brain, also known as the limbic system, has been doing what it does best: keeping us out of harms way. Then along comes the neocortex, the logical brain, to make things much complex.
Now a person knows that if he or she can't do physical harm, an insulting remark will often do the trick. Although it's not a physical attack, your emotional brain still recognizes the bad intentions and responds accordingly.
If you aren't careful, in 3-5 seconds for the chemicals that produce emotions flood your system creating what is often referred to as an emotional hijacking. Your emotions could become your enemies.
In life and death situations that call for immediate action an emotional hijacking might save your life. (Think about jumping out of the way of a moving car.)
At work, however, an emotional hijacking might cost you your job. It might cost you a deal, undermine a negotiation, or ruin a relationship.
So, I guess the timeless advice about counting to ten to calm yourself down is verified, not only by common sense, but also science. Hopefully, counting to ten will give your logical brain a better chance of getting back in control.
So, if you ever feel a wave of emotions flooding your system, pause and do your best access your neocortex. Leading expert on developing Emotional Intelligence--Joshua Freeman, calls it the "six second pause."
I've found that, for me it's even better to take the four extra seconds and go for the full ten count just to be sure. Because it can be so costly, impulsive behavior is nothing to play with.
When I was growing up my mom used to always say to me, "Al, don't let your friends get you in trouble."
Mom, you never told me that you were talking about my emotions.
It's hard to argue with the premise that emotions are the most powerful force governing our behavior. In many cases, emotions serve as great guardians of your well-being. Their primary function is to ensure your survival so, they can be strong allies.
Do you remember the old adage, "With friends like these, who needs enemies?" That couldn't ring more true than when it comes to emotions.
It is a scientific fact that if left untamed, our basic emotions (anger, joy, disgust, surprise, distress, and fear) would cause you to kill first and ask questions later. Or run first and ask questions later. This is known as Flight or Fight Response.
Flight or Fight Response applies to more than physical situations. Emotions gone wild will have you shouting, crying, or making incorrect assumptions. All of this is done in the name of survival.
In the heat of the moment, be it physical or psychological, your body initially responds to attacks (i.e. insults) a similar same manner. Think about that.
Although they are supposed to be our friends, emotions frequently leave us in a world of trouble. Why? The answer is simple.
Human beings are biologically engineered for survival, not diplomacy.
For countless generations, the emotional brain, also known as the limbic system, has been doing what it does best: keeping us out of harms way. Then along comes the neocortex, the logical brain, to make things much complex.
Now a person knows that if he or she can't do physical harm, an insulting remark will often do the trick. Although it's not a physical attack, your emotional brain still recognizes the bad intentions and responds accordingly.
If you aren't careful, in 3-5 seconds for the chemicals that produce emotions flood your system creating what is often referred to as an emotional hijacking. Your emotions could become your enemies.
In life and death situations that call for immediate action an emotional hijacking might save your life. (Think about jumping out of the way of a moving car.)
At work, however, an emotional hijacking might cost you your job. It might cost you a deal, undermine a negotiation, or ruin a relationship.
So, I guess the timeless advice about counting to ten to calm yourself down is verified, not only by common sense, but also science. Hopefully, counting to ten will give your logical brain a better chance of getting back in control.
So, if you ever feel a wave of emotions flooding your system, pause and do your best access your neocortex. Leading expert on developing Emotional Intelligence--Joshua Freeman, calls it the "six second pause."
I've found that, for me it's even better to take the four extra seconds and go for the full ten count just to be sure. Because it can be so costly, impulsive behavior is nothing to play with.
When I was growing up my mom used to always say to me, "Al, don't let your friends get you in trouble."
Mom, you never told me that you were talking about my emotions.
About the Author:
Who else is looking for a fun, engaging and inspiring youth motivational speaker? Then visit his site to find out about how Al Duncan, one of the world's leading youth motivational speakers can help students build a competitive advantage in the 21st Century.
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